Here are the main signs you're in an unhappy marriage and what to do about it, according to marriage therapists.

Constant criticism is an indication that feelings of love and warmth for each other are being replaced by judgment. If you're constantly criticizing each other, that's not a good sign, according to licensed therapist and co-founder of Viva Wellness Jor-El Caraballo, LMHC. "Criticism or name-calling is a huge boundary violation," adds licensed marriage and family therapist Shane Birkel, LMFT.

Another sign of an unhappy marriage is a virtually nonexistent sex life. Or, when you do have sex on the rare occasion, it's not great. Of course, not having sex all the time isn't necessarily a bad thing, and some couples don't mind a sexless relationship. It's not so much about how often married couples have sex; rather, it's about whether you enjoy the sex with your spouse and feel good about your shared sex life.

Being around each other may feel like a chore, or extremely forced. Without the sense of intimacy that was once there, you may feel like you have nothing to say—and also don't really care what they have to say.

When something exciting happens, who's the first one you call? If it was once your spouse and now it's a friend or family member, that's a sign your marriage has taken a hit. Birkel notes that in unhappy marriages, there isn't much motivation to connect or share anything.

Caraballo and Birkel both note that constant defensiveness is a sure sign that the two of you aren't communicating well, going hand in hand with the constant criticism. Simple statements or questions can also be met with backlash. For example, when one partner reminds the other to do a chore, they may get defensive and say something along the lines of, "I already said I was going to do it—don't guilt-trip me."

Birkel says that generally avoiding each other is also a relatively obvious sign things aren't going well. You'll likely make separate plans and have no motivation to spend time together—all of which point to an unhappy marriage.

It's entirely possible that fantasies of leaving or being single will start to pop up in your mind. You're becoming aware of the issues facing your marriage and how the marriage makes you feel, and it's inevitably causing you to think of the other possibilities.

Something Birkel has frequently noticed is a clash of attachment styles: "There's a spectrum of people who are pursuers," he explains, "who are kind of boundary-less and get their self-esteem from how the other person feels about them. And then there are withdrawers—conflict avoiders that don't want to talk about issues." In these scenarios, there's often a cycle of one pursuing and the other withdrawing, only to cause more subsequent pursuing and withdrawing.

When you first get together with your spouse, you're supposed to feel like they bring out the best in you, and you like who you are around them. In an unhappy marriage, you'll feel more yourself when they're not around and may even dislike who you are around them, Birkel says.

Not arguing anymore roughly translates to the two of you not being willing to work through things anymore, Birkel says. Arguing isn't great, obviously, but at least it means you're still fighting for something. "Losing motivation to work through things with each other is a really bad sign."

Whether you've been together for decades or you're just not keen on the idea of divorce, accepting you're in an unhappy marriage can be very difficult. This can result in denial, or an "inability to recognize negative patterns," Birkel says, adding, "if you don't recognize it, it's going to be very difficult to improve on your relationship."

Things like blame, judgment, and shaming will often take front stage in an unhappy marriage, Birkel says, leaving little to no room for understanding or compassion. When something goes wrong or isn't working, no one's willing to give the other the benefit of the doubt, a supportive gesture, or even just a loving tone of voice.

We can tell a lot from body language, and it's usually not too hard to read when you know what to look for. Very basically, you and your spouse may always angle yourselves away from each other, even when speaking. You may cross your arms or put your hands on your hips a lot, in a dominating or defensive manner.

Being in each other's presence is no longer warm and joyful and instead likely feels cold, awkward, and uncomfortable. This may actually show up in certain body language, such as the examples mentioned above, but it can also simply be an overwhelming feeling that you don't want to be physically near each other. A. marriage without intimacy may struggle to survive.

Along with defensiveness and criticism, contempt is one of the "Four Horsemen" of relationships described by The Gottman Institute, one of the leaders in relationship research, Caraballo explains. Contempt is a kind of extreme disdain for another person, akin to hatred and disgust. It's a lingering emotion, and it will make most encounters with your spouse unpleasant.

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In the case of negative body language in relationships and marriage, some examples include:

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According to psychologist Debra Campbell, Ph.D., if you do want to stay together, "Act now if you want to save the relationship with openness, energy, empathy, love, and most of all by teaming up again." She says that this is your relationship’s trial by fire, and now's the time to really fight for each other. "Turn to one another with a shared focus, or keep gazing out the side windows, ignoring each other, at your own peril," she previously wrote for mindbodygreen.

And always remember, Birkel says, if you've made the decision to work on your problems and try to save your marriage, "This is a person you love and care about and want to make it work with," he says. Remind yourself of that fact often.

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In the meantime, you may benefit from learning how to emotionally detach from your partner and set strong boundaries.

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For anonymous and confidential help, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (or TTY 1-800-787-3224) and speak with a trained advocate for free as many times as you need. They're available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You can also speak to them through a live private chat on their website.